Some moral arguments for the registration of cyclists

It often grieves me sorely to see cyclists ignoring road rules, riding on the footpath, and generally making a public nuisance of themselves in their technicolour lycra.

Indeed, it makes me gnash my teeth in rage.

Hence, it always warms the cockles of my heart when prominent members of the community call for the regulation of public cycling, through such measures as registration plates on bicycles etc.

Pondering this issue, I am greatly surprised that most cyclists don't agree with me that further regulation of cyclists is a good thing.

You see, the thing about cyclists is that they seem to be over represented amongst green voters and other trendy latte leftist sorts - the type of people who generally tend to support higher taxation and regulation of other aspects of peoples' lives. They are the sort of people who would want to over-regulate or ban gun ownership, introduce health warnings onto fast food or alcohol, increase taxes on cigarettes, and generally try to use legislation to control most aspects of peoples' lives.

Not a nice bunch.

Even non-leftist cyclists are into over-regulating life. Look at Tony Abbott, the most right wing cyclist around. As a Howard government minister, he sought to introduce the 'access card', which, effectively, would be a national ID card - something which most believers in individual rights would be appalled at (I know I am - but I have expressed my dislike of Abbott repeatedly).

Consequently, I think that a proper registration scheme for cyclists would be not only good and proper, but it would also fit in well with the cyclists' general political world view - one of using government to interfere and regulate private life to an unhealthy degree.

I think that a registration system, with proper charges and fees, would be good for cyclists for the following reasons:

. myself and the other 70% of the population who resent cyclists would have less reason to resent them for freeloading on the roads and ignoring road rules & common courtesy

. it would be easier to identify and punish the many rogue cyclists who break the road rules

. money raised in the registration scheme could get spent on building some more bike paths (I think Coode Island would be a great location for a bike track)

. theft of expensive bicycles by poorer cyclists (remember that many cyclists are thieves) would be harder

. cyclists who do sick things like expose themselves in parks would get caught immediately, rather than taking the police months to hunt down and apprehend.

Ah... if only we lived in a more perfect world where cyclists would be able to benefit directly thus from their love of government regulation.